I think it’s finally over. The dust swirling, uncertainty, and the loss of security one builds in any relationship divine or not.
And – Arta is still here. With two older Gods that I had hoped would cease their silence after now six years.
So, a spirit worker has to understand this ebb and flow. It’s going to happen, whether any of us like it or not. It’s called evolving as a person in my own opinion, and sometimes it isn’t gentle, kind, or even understandable. In the end – it’s usually necessary.
I read Sarah Lawless’ blog – and I’m on the opposite end. I fought tooth and nail that I’m not a healer (if I was, then a shitty one in my own mind), and in my own mind a healer was one who was gentle, polite, and calming – the Mr. Rogers of Pagans I guess. Not some rough, blunt, and abrasive person.
The hell kind of healer is that?!
I can really understand where she’s coming from – I on my end am a metalworker, leather-worker, welder, fabricator, muscle-bound and stubborn with one hell of a mighty temper (ask my publisher any day).
To me – that isn’t what a healer is. So like her but opposite, I chucked it aside. I denied it. So, I studied the ‘Poison Path,’ to venture farther into the Otherworlds. It seemed like something I was supposed to do since, hell, I ain’t a healer.
But that’s when I was shown from Arta and my Smithing Gods, that blacksmiths are healers. Not necessarily the most gentle – but effective. You don’t go to a smithy for healing for subtle problems – you go to the smithy for the problems that make you shriek golden words into the night in a blind fury.
And if you know any smithy’s – those of whom are former warriors or just grizzled by life itself – aren’t going to shirk those issues.
I sure as hell aren’t the best at it, but I have to accept this as part of what I do. So, I am furthering my learning into healing botany and herbs – hell I’m a 4th generation herbalist for fuck’s sake.. Time to just hang my head and not be so damned stubborn.
Huh, we’ll just have to see how this goes.